12 Funny Sayings about Authors

Hi! I thought I’d share a few smiles with some funny quotes I found on the internet. Have a great day!

Manuscript: something submitted in haste and returned at leisure. Oliver Herford.

Writing is learning to say nothing, more cleverly every day. William Allingham.

The profession of book-writing makes horse racing seem like a solid, stable business. John Steinbeck.

I love being a writer. What I can’t stand is the paperwork. Peter De Vries.

Copy from one, it’s plagiarism; copy from two, it’s research. Wilson Mizner.

“Paradise Lost is a book that, once put down, is very hard to pick up again.” Samuel Johnson I had to read this twice, and laughed both times! I’ve never read “Paradise Lost” and am now not sure I should! 🙂

I am returning this otherwise good typing paper to you because someone has printed gibberish all over it and put your name at the top.  ~English Professor (Name Unknown), Ohio University

Do not put statements in the negative form.
And don’t start sentences with a conjunction.
If you reread your work, you will find on rereading that a
great deal of repetition can be avoided by rereading and editing.
Never use a long word when a diminutive one will do.
Unqualified superlatives are the worst of all.
De-accession euphemisms.
If any word is improper at the end of a sentence, a linking verb is.
Avoid trendy locutions that sound flaky.
Last, but not least, avoid cliches like the plague.
~William Safire, “Great Rules of Writing”

Being an author is being in charge of your own personal insane asylum.  ~Terri Guillemets

A story should have a beginning, a middle, and an end… but not necessarily in that order.  ~Jean Luc Godard

It took me fifteen years to discover I had no talent for writing, but I couldn’t give it up because by that time I was too famous.  ~Robert Benchley Oh dear! May I never say this!

Publication is a self-invasion of privacy.  Marshall McLuhan

Quotes found on:
http://www.quotegarden.com/writing.html
http://www.basicjokes.com/dquotes.php?cid=319

What about you? Have you heard any rip-snorters lately that beg telling? Share the giggles. 🙂

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4 thoughts on “12 Funny Sayings about Authors

  1. Susan Donetti

    Then there’s the definition of writer’s block. When your imaginary friends stop talking to you!
    Thanks for finding these. Good for a laugh. 🙂

    Like

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